Regretting My Low Social Capital (Part 2)

I had a lot more to say in part one, but it would have been too much for one post. Picking up from where I left off...

I'm at the point in my life where I'd love to share it with a special woman, but due to my low friend count, I sometimes think that I'm getting ahead of myself - as if I'm putting the cart before the horse. A good number of dating articles say that being a loner can be a red flag when looking for a mate, although some say that this can work for good, too. Having said that, in my experience, my lack of friends always proves to be a stumbling block.

A few years ago, there was one pretty (or so I thought) young lady who recently started going to my church. Honestly, it was a crush from first sight; it took me quite a bit of time to chalk up the nerve to ask for her number. When I did, I didn't exactly play it smooth, but I ended up coming off very nervously. Perhaps she sensed this and already wrote me off before I dialed her digits and made my pitch.

That first call was very awkward, to say the least. Among the questions asked: when did I last have a girlfriend (junior high school), what was my testimony - or did I not have one (I found that last part very rude), and who did I hang out with from church? The lady was already unimpressed, but when I answered that last question, I might as well have given up then and there. Ironically, she told me that I need to "go out and meet people" - which, strangely enough, is exactly what I was trying to do here. After putting up with being told that my life is "so boring" for two calls in a row, I ripped up her number and put it where it belonged. I'd much rather be lonely and single than go through that crap.

She isn't the only person I've encountered who thought it odd that I don't hang out with friends on a regular basis. A few weeks ago, I was talking with a fellow churchgoer about a movie I recently saw; it was probably State Of Play. He asked if I "called my boys" and watched the movie, to which I replied, "What boys?" His reaction wasn't nearly as rude as that of my former crush, but I could tell he was surprised to hear that my social "circle" is really a dot.

There are other reasons that I can't even think about dating right now, like being unemployed. I think the then-prospect of it hurt my chances with a recent lady I went on one date with, although the fact that I "speak in parables" (her words) probably didn't help. Regardless, people always tell me that love strikes when you least expect it, so perhaps I should set aside one month's salary in anticipation.

Actually, I would...if I was still earning a long-term salary in the first place. ;-)